Silence in many Black families has long been seen as something more than merely avoiding the topic. It has also been seen as a way to protect one another. For many generations, emotional expression has not been seen as a strength. In many cases, the topic of mental health has not been seen as a viable topic of discussion.

But it seems the definition of strength is beginning to change in many circles in the Black community.

The movement toward healing has been driven not only by younger generations like Gen-Z, but also by a cultural shift in how vulnerability and resilience are defined across the broader community.

Traditionally, silence has also been closely associated with survival. In the past, societies were characterized by segregation, discrimination and inaccessible resources. Being vulnerable could have significant consequences. As a result, emotional control was emphasized as a way to stay safe in a world in which one would have to remain poised under pressure. The dictum “what happens in this house stays in this house,” often heard in Black homes, further emphasizes the need to control one’s feelings rather than allowing them to spill over.

Yet, there is evidence to support that such prolonged emotional suppression as a result of societal pressure can negatively affect mental well-being. A study published in Development and Psychopathology and indexed in the National Institutes of Health’s PubMed Central database (PMC) investigating the implications of racial stress and emotion coping strategies among Black adolescents established that such behavior as constantly repressing emotions may lead to increased psychological distress and problems with emotional control. Although such strategies may be developed to help individuals survive in society, they can also prevent them from recognizing and addressing their emotional problems.

For some, this silence began at a very early age.

For Tawana Lee, a social worker and mother of four, being emotional was not only risky but also unpredictable in her childhood home… The stark differences between Lee’s and her mother’s personalities and perspectives often created tension and conflict.

“I cried a lot, I know that, but I don’t really think I did it in front of her [her mother], because I learned early on, way early, whether I cried in front of her, whether I was upset, no matter what I did, it was a gamble of making her more upset. So I did most of the stuff in my room away from her.”

Research from the University of Georgia on Black youth and racial stress finds that navigating discrimination and chronic stress can create a significant emotional toll, shaping how individuals process and manage emotions over time.

“It took quite a long time, and I’m still working on it, to be able to put down that guard,” Lee said. “Control is the word because I don’t want anybody trying to tell me what to do, or, like I said, with not knowing when she’s on, pop off. I need to control this situation.”

Lee talked about the impact on her relationships, parenting and emotional security, a phenomenon mental health experts have found to be connected to environments where emotional expression was not encouraged.

Lee recalled one incident in disciplining her child that made her realize that she had to break away from the patterns she had learned from her mother.

She said, “I see what I am doing right now. I am turning into my mom. This is abuse. I’m trying to control him. He is totally not even listening right now. So what is my point right now?”

For many, awareness is the turning point.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reveal the ongoing struggles faced by Black Americans in receiving mental health services due to stigma, cost, and access to culturally effective treatment.

For younger generations, however, this conversation is vastly different when asked about their upbringing and their immigrant family’s approach to mental health.

These discrepancies are not only attributed to issues of access, but also to stigma and deep-rooted cultural perspectives on mental illness.

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Hannah Slowe, a 19-year-old college student and daughter of immigrant parents from Guyana, a country on the northern coast of South America, described growing up in a household where emotions were often dismissed or misunderstood.

“I would say, honestly, they [emotions] weren’t even really handled as properly. It was more of just trying to brush it off, or being told to act strong.”

Like many others, she has had to overcome this behavior over time.

“One of the behaviors I had to unlearn was staying quiet,” she said. “There would be times where I would be going through something, and I wouldn’t tell anybody, but I had friends I could tell, you know, …I had a support system, but I wasn’t using it, because, back at home, I wasn’t used to telling my parents if something was wrong.”

For Slowe, healing has meant choosing to be more open. Through therapy, she has learned new ways of thinking about her emotions.

Within family structures, conflict can arise between individuals with differing views on emotional expression. For some in older generations who have survived in a system where support is scarce, there is a belief in the power of silence. Today, more and more people are questioning these beliefs passed down through generations, not to reject them, but to reinterpret them.

“I mainly feel we’re just tired of it. I also heard that mental health spreads through generations as well, and I feel like we’ve seen our peers go through things,” said Slowe.

This increased awareness is a sign of a larger cultural change. Protecting mental health is not just considered an individual’s responsibility; it is a social process influenced by history, access and cultural change. In this changing world, what it means to be strong is changing. While silence has traditionally been a sign of strength, vulnerability is now being seen as a sign of courage.

Breaking this cycle is not about forgetting the past. It is about understanding it and moving forward. “We’ve seen how it’s affected our parents and ourselves; we don’t want that for ourselves or even our future kids, and we know that mental health can affect our relationships and even how we go about our daily lives,” Slowe said.